Thursday, December 4, 2008


Tonight one of the most awkward conversations in the history of Grey's Anatomy occurred between Izzie and Christina. A paraphrased version:

Izzie: I may not get the solo surgery but i am having the best sex ever. Out of anyone in the world. No one else has ever had sex as good as the sex I am having right now with my dead fiance. If everyone else had a ghost to have sex with they would have sex in the storage closest at the hospital in the middle of the afternoon just like I just did.

Christina: Please go away

Denny used to by my favorite character on this dumb show and now his character has been ruined beyond redemption. He is like stalker ghost! If ghost Denny had a ipod I hope he is listening to the stalker song ( note I am about to listen to stalker song). He shows up in the lounge, he watches Alex and Izzie get it on, he is in the operating room. Please go back to wherever you came from Denny.

Now lets discuss how adorable my boy Alex Karev was in this episode. Not only does he refuse to suck up to Christina but he declares his love for Izzie ( he could seriously do so much better) and shows his sensitive side when he starts talking about how Izzie is his best chance for happiness. I am so glad that Alex got the solo surgery.

What was with the random intern at the beginning of the show announcing that he was going to have sex? This show doesn't even try to be about medicine anymore. I think Mark sloane is like 3 episodes from being a likable character. He might be nearing the end of his man whore ways. And of course the moral of this show was don't text and drive.

Monday, November 17, 2008

back when grey's was (somewhat) good...

i have been reminiscing over my favorite over-the-top, jumping-the-shark, yelling-at-the-TV moments from the last 4 seasons. the following are just a few memorable scenes and quotes, listed in order of increasing ridiculosity:

10."do you like jail!?!"
[cristina and izzy steal a body to do an autopsy].

if a patient ever specifically makes a request against a medical procedure, the grey's doctors only find that as direct encouragement to go on with the exact thing. (for further discussion: see #3: prom/denny). nevermind that they did discover the man died of a genetic disease, nevermind that they did eventually get the family's permission, i could have done with a few minutes of seeing izzy and yang behind bars.

9."i hate trout!!!
[addison hates trout/the men go camping].

there really is no excuse to live in a little tiny camping trailer on a huge plot of land when you're a multi-million-dollar earning surgeon, so i'm totally behind Addison on this one. never should have given up that brownstone in manhattan, girl. and those doctors have no more business going fishing and getting all outdoorsy than would paris hilton running for president – your expertise is in the OR, which comes to point all to soon when somebody catches joe's boyfriend with a fishhook in the back of the head.

8."that was mark."
[mcdreamy punches mcsteamy in the face].

sloane shows up in seattle and takes all of 2 seconds to start hitting on meredith, which prompts derek to fly from wherever in the hospital to clock him in the side of the head – only giving sloane further chance to show off and suture his own face and earn his own nickname: "mcsteamy." i'm with george on this one: "choking back some mc-vomit."

7. "i've spent lots of time imagining myself half-naked in a room full of women and the reality is so much better."
[george gets syphilis].

before george became the man-whore of seattle grace (seriously, calculate how many people he's slept with!), he was all sweet and innocent – and slapped with an STD. and somehow the entire intern crew managed to show up and check out his ass when he was getting his antibiotics. poor george.

6. "it looks like santa threw up in here."/"it's what jesus would freakin' do!!!"
[izzy goes christmas overboard].

for the portions of the population who don't enjoy the piney-smell of fir trees, peppermint sweetness of candy canes, twinkling lights in the snow, and bright holiday melodies, i understand why this episode would make you want to poke your eyes out with a pencil. even i – with my tendencies to start the holiday music in mid-september - found izzy to be annoyingly annoying and diminishing of my own christmas spirit. but, at least she got a dose of reality with her overwhelming christmas cheer by doing something she absolutely hated: pretending to be a sick, overweight farmer to help alex study for his boards.

5. "we screw boys like whores on tequila."
[everybody has slept with everybody at least once, maybe even twice].

i cannot look at a tequila shot without having a little voice in the back of my head pipe up and chide, "don't end up like meredith grey….". it would take A LOT of tequila to get me anywhere close to meredith's status, or the status of anyone else on that show, considering they make bad sexual decisions with less abandon and more frequency than a normal person does when sending an e-mail.

4. "i'm bambi, george!"
[izzy resuscitates a deer].

this whole episode was a giant wtf moment. being an animal lover, i certainly wasn't delighted to see the deer in pain, but i wasn't reduced to a sobbing blubbery mess as when doc was put to sleep either. can you really use a portable defibrillator on a deer? and if you do, does the deer really jump up onto all its four legs and walk off into the sunset as though it was never hit by a truck?

3. whose panties are on the bulletin board!?"
[seattle grace throws a prom/izzy cuts denny's wires].

random event: the hospital throws a prom. despie wanting to be DNR, izzy cuts denny's wires in an attempt to get him a new heart (he does) and then spends too much time deciding what prom dress to wear (he dies). meredith puts her dog to sleep, sleeps with derek in a hospital room, loses her underwear, breaks up with mcvet, and manages to look mopey the entire time. everyone else in the episode generally runs around like chickens with their heads cut off.

2. meredith's multiple deaths
[meredith grabs hold of the bomb/meredith falls off a ferry boat]

as her therapist asks (in slightly more kind terms), what the hell is wrong with you that you keep putting yourself in these situations?! only meredith grey could grab ahold of a bomb and prevent it from going off, only to have it kill a member of the bomb squad (whose death is never mentioned again) and then have him reappear in her limbo-like state when she falls off a ferry boat. bomb man, train woman, denny, and doc (which sounds like a companion show to aqua teen hunger force) all magically reappear in meredith's dream to tell her to enjoy her life (i.e., less mopey) before they randomly start gushing blood and re-enacting their deaths. break out the elaine scarry and apply the trauma theory on these storylines.

1. "oh my god, you have a [fill-in-the-blank-with-exceedingly-rare-medical-mystery] case!?!"
[full gamut of medical calamities]

a man who eats scissors; bomb in a body cavity!; exploding necks; a man who chainsaws off his foot; impaled on a train; impaled on a tree; encased in cement; woman crushed by ferry boat; pregnant man; "his piercing is stuck on my IUD. and we're divorced;" brain tumors; body tumors; spontaneous orgasms; PENIS FISH.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

A Eulogy for Grey's Anatomy, the worst show on TV that I still kinda loved.

Hey Grey's Anatomy, remember when you were an actual show that dealt with actual issues, like ferry boat disasters, girls with terminal cancer who just wanted a prom, the ethics of the doctor-patient relationship, how to handle an unexpected pregnancy and syphilis?

And then remember that one night you suddenly became a show about lesbians and ghost sex?

Nothing against the lesbians actually, but.....ghost sex?!?!!
Okay, to be fair the ghost sex hasn't occurred just yet [but if the previews are any indication, it will shortly].

The only way I will forgive this is if it's some elaborate set-up to show that Izzie is already dead [yessssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!] and that Alex is the crazy one hallucinating that she's still here. Because as we all know, Alex tends to like his ladies on the crazy side - so maybe, he's actually the crazy one.

Oh! Or, maybe everyone is already dead - because as Meredith's near death experience taught us, the after world looks just like Seattle Grace. Satre-ian twists like that I would expect from a show like Lost [return please!], but hey, maybe Dr. McArmy is the new Henry Gale. At the very least I can hope for a cross-over episode with two very different versions of hell: the 12th ranked teaching hospital in the nation in Seattle, or a tropical island with magical qualities and polar bears.
And since my heathen ways will probably land me in hell, I'm totally choosing the tropical island with magical qualities and polar bears when my time comes.

Even more ominous was Dr. Dixon's declaration that "I don't like this hospital - I don't like this hospital at all" - do the writers even like this hospital they created anymore? Or are they trying to sabatoge themselves? And for godssakes, where the hell was George?!!!

Hell may be other people, or it may just be the people at Seattle Grace.

a human pretzel?!

every week i think grey's cannot top itself: that the medical cases cannot get more outlandish, that the relationships cannot get more convoluted, but the show (atleast on this level) does not disappoint. tonight's episode featured a man caught in a trash compactor impaled on his own femur, a high-functioning autistic surgeon, a haunted heart, and denny's ghost - plus meredith's wild college roommate who willingly sliced open her own back with a scalpel, just to practice stitching. the fact that all of those things can fit into the same 42-minute episode is pretty amazing, and, of course, each of those generates plenty "wtf moments:"

1. trash compactor man. if this homeless man were from detroit, he would be lying next to the woman who had her face and hair ripped off, but because we're in seattle the entire surgical team is going to try to save him. don't doubt my empathy or the fact that all patients should all be treated equally, but trash-compacted man turned out to just be a showcase for callie to process her hahn emotions (which will never be fully processed, but only repressed, so that they can return in various forms - see discussion of denny's ghost).

2. highly-fuctioning autistic surgeon. considering that half the people in my graduate school are probably suffering from some sort level of asperger's syndrome (the jury's still out on me), i fully understand that dr. wilson can be an amazing heart surgeon and still unable to interact with the general population. however, seattle grace is not the general population, so you'd think they would have some sympathy.

3. haunted heart. this plotline was on the borderline of believeable (until the heart magically started beating again), but it was so closely tied to denny's ghost that i found it annoying, as usual.

4. denny's ghost. if denny is real, then is izzie already partly dead? or, was there some ridiculously elaborate trick where he wasn't really dead at all? either way, i am ready for them both to go toward the light. take izzie, take a few spare hearts and scalpels, and go - because this extension of the denny storyline is getting annoying and stretched too thin for even grey's viewers to believe. izzie was finallllly, ever-so-slightly moving foward (and dragging alex along with her), and then denny comes back to pull them into the hospital limbo that he, apparently, still haunts. if "i'm coming for you" truly means "i'm taking you with me," then get on with it shonda rimes! and stop subjecting us to the torturous drawn-out death of their relationship.

5. "die and death." meredith's college nickname tells a lot about her past and personality, especially for a person who was "dead once" and continually chooses to be mopey and gloomy. [though, i must admit, in the last few episodes she has exhibited more of the "warm-and-gooey, lives-with-a-boy" characteristics than the mopey ones. not sure how i feel about that]. and, as per usual, the old roommate disappeared halfway through the episode. she will likely pop-up next week after having done something utterly ridiculous (like removing a colleague's perfectly good appendix!!!!)

other random exclamations:

[please drag izzie in front of a bus right now. denny, you are getting annoying].

[the only way i will continue to tolerate you is if you bring back doc].

"little sloane does not enter little grey." good god, that was not necessary.

[plus sloane is going to sleep with callie in .238745 seconds.]

"shut it down." seriously, cristina, if you actually taught your interns shit then you would know how to do a slam-bam pulley stitch too, instead of getting the credit. and making out with mccamo is probably not the best idea, considering he's clearly got some issues going on.

alex is finally going to get turned around and then izzie is going to fuck him over because of her denny-complex.

and flash-forward to next week:

oh yes, have sex with a ghost. that always helps.

stop operating on each other! where is that dummy that yells and bleeds? that's what he's for!

karebare665 (10:08:32 PM): you can't have sex with a ghost
karebare665 (10:08:34 PM): you just can't
karebare665 (10:08:43 PM): not even in the greys universe

Monday, November 10, 2008

musical beds?

as today i did not feel like paying any attention in class whatsoever, i decided to exercise the little brain cells i have left by recounting my grey's knowledge.

we all know - and love - that the show is just s soap opera barely disguised as a medical drama because it is set in a hospital. love triangles, squares, and octagons are veiled behind a once-in-a-lifetime medical mystery.

just to prove how ridiculous this show is, i constructed a chart of all the main characters and their (sexual) relationships.

some surprising (and not so surprising conclusions):

1. only bailey and the chief have managed to not sleep with another member of the (current) staff. (of course, if former staff were included, the chief's relationship with ellis grey would be called into question).

2. surprisingly, george has slept with as many people as alex, even though alex is likely considered to be the bigger "man whore" of the two. (if george hooks up with lexie - which is likely going to happen in about 2 seconds - he will surpass alex for the title of "man whore #1 of seattle grace").

3. there are a lot of attendings on this show. they have an eternal revolving door, because doctor's keep fucking up, leaving for california, or becoming lesbians - all three reasons are enough to get your character written off the show, atleast in the eyes of ABC TV execs.

4. this show has been on 4 seasons (which has only really been like 2 weeks in the skewed timeline of grey's world) which means that these people have spent an awful lot of time having sex to rack up these stats. they wonder why they've sunk to the #12 research hospital? seems pretty obvious to me.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Grey's. Pick your shit up. Seriously.

So the season premiere had promise, but come on guys....pigs?! For realz?! Some tips to make this so far lackluster season better:

1. So Hahn's departure was abrupt and unnecessary and kinda sucky because I like her [she was actually sensible, which meant she kind of filled Addison's place] but I am also sort of relieved to see the Hahn/Callie relationship end. It was starting to get weird and forced, mainly because watching Bailey's whole my-vay-jay-jay-is-like-Africa speech to Callie with my mom was awkward.

2. Izzie + Alex = zzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzz. Yeah I know Alex might want some stability right now since his last lady love went cuckoo and cut her wrists, but come on, its just not like him to agree to "go steady." Let's mix this shit up okay?

3. Meredith + Derek = even more zzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz. I know keeping Meredith and Derek apart was getting annoying, but actually they are even more annoying together. Now they are all schmaltzy and diary-finding and whatnot, and well, boring. Break the fuck up again. Thanks.

4. Bring the therapist back!!

5. Britney Spears guest spot!! [she has experience riding in ambulances, it will be cool].

6. More George! Now that he's gotten over that inexplicable Gizzie hump, he's back to being adorable. So up the George ante - last week he was only in the episode for like 4 seconds. Unacceptable.

7. Give Mark Sloane a character trait that isn't being horny. And give him a story line that doesn't involve sleeping with someone on the staff. Gasp! I know it will be difficult.

8. Dr. McArmy scares the shit out me. Please make him less frightening.

9. Please please do something to that horrible whiny Izzie. Maybe she can see Denny because she herself is close to crossing over to the other side?!!! I can keep the hope alive.

10. Icicle? Please. And that flood was not as disasterous as it could have been. Three words: Natural. fucking. disaster.

I have hope for next week since the promo was Elaine Scarry in television form!!!! [yay]

Thursday, October 9, 2008

the great flood of 2008?

despite our little vacation from last week (due to the vice presidential debate, dontcha know), all us average-joe-six-packs are ready get up from the kitchen table and sit on the living room couch to get our regular fix of grey's.

i know i'm ready for the surgeons to to see all those mavericks take on the chief's authority like mavericks. clearly, rules are just made to be broken; i know that gives all the hockey moms at home a real thrill.

based on the previews, we know the hospital is going to flood and i can only hope it's going to be like titanic - with doors exploding from the water pressure and people taking the elevator downstairs to only find water rushing in before it stops. (i can also hope that this flood is because the space needle fell over and poked a hole in a water tower on top of seattle grace, but that might be too much for even the grey's writers). maybe they should just have the whole cast build an ark.

Friday, September 26, 2008

A warm and gooey person who lives with a boy.

Aside from the fact that Meredith chose this episode to describe herself as a fresh from the oven chocolate chip cookie.....yes! yes! yes!

Okay, so an ice storm isn't exactly the natural disaster I have been begging for these 5 long years, but you know - baby steps. And actually I think this episode was a step in the right direction of bringing Grey's out of that hole it fell into when it decided to spend an episode in heaven with Denny, the dog, and the bomb man. Or whatever.

And based on last night's episode, here are some suggestions/observations [as always, a list]:

1. Mark Sloane needs to get involved in an extended plot line ASAP. Because now that Addison is gone, his friendship with Derek repaired, and Hahn now a lesbian....he needs something to do. Because he basically just spent this entire episode throwing out barbs at Derek and advising Lexie on her love life [?!?!!!11] Some sort of weird love triangle between Lexie-Sloane-George seems it might be brewing, but it in that case, George probably wouldn't stand a chance. Normally, I really wouldn't care what the fuck Mark Sloane did, but ever since the [albeit awesome] "This man is a whore" speech, I kinda feel for maybe seeing him involved in plot that doesn't involve womanizing would be refreshing.

2. Stop regressing Alex Karev!!!! ["I had a bad night and cried like a girl. I'm over it."]

2.5 I feel the seeming random Alex was getting it on with will prove important [or that we know her already] since there seemed to be a pointed effort to not show us her face just yet...her hair looked vaguely like Rose's - but hey, I wouldn't put it past Alex to just get it on with some random either.

3. Hahn and Callie are kinda cute in a sort weird, strange way. [Why was Katy Perry not playing in the background when they had their 'I've never kissed a girl' conversation btw?]

4. When George told Lexie he slept with Meredith he implied it happened "last year." So he slept with Meredith, married Callie in Vegas, slept with Izzie, got divorced and failed the intern exam all in one year?! This is the show's 5th season - there is no way all this shit went down in one year. Fix your damn timeline already Grey's.

5. Um, couldn't you just let the icicle melt.......?

6. Flashforwards/ dreams/ hallucinations/ whatever....are they real? Will they come true? Or are they just you know, dreams? Will Jack and Kate and Sawyer and Ben and Locke make cameos?

7. One more thing on these flashfowards/dreams [or whatever]: on her blog Shondra Rhimes said that "all the clues for this season are in the first episode." Sooooooooo....Izzie meeting Denny at the elevator and getting to show him her prom dress - since that ill-fated heaven episode proved to us that heaven does indeed look like Seattle Grace, and that Denny inhabits it still, does Izzie die and thats how she's greeted in heaven?!?!!?!?!!111 [zomg! please!]

8. Another reason to dislike Sarah Palin: her stupid debate preempts Grey's next week, so I have to wait 2 weeks for another episode.

9. I take that back, her debate is going to be hillarious.

10. Since Rhode Island is about to get hit by a "coastal storm" and tropical storm Kyle all within two days and will probably flood within 4 hours - its a small state - I am definitely looking forward to the hospital flooding. That is, if my house hasn't floated away by then.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Not thesising, but suggesting.

Having been living in a haze the past month or so due to continued thesis writing, my foggy brain had little thought for things beyond the year 1676 - but today I watched some adverts on for tonight's new season. And praise the Lord! The Grey's I know and love is back. Blood! Crashing cars! Pregnancy! Alex Karev! George O'Malley!

Some suggestions for this season:

1. George O'Malley better be the adorable foppy haired dude who accidentally looked at Bailey's vay jay jay again or else I will be pissed. I had to endure a season of fucking Gizzie and I deserve my George back. Seriously.

2. I see Jill suggests that McDreamy gets abducted by aliens, a prediction which I fully support since this summer I went through a phase where I watched like at least one X-Files episode daily...and I discovered that James Pickens, Jr - aka the Chief - also plays one of Mulder and Scully's bosses, and that the infamous penis fish man was played by the same actor who played M & S's other boss. David Duchovny is all busy getting sex-recovered and starring in Californication, but I assume Gillian Anderson is totally free for a cameo [plus Scully is actually a doctor!].

3. Kill off Izzie. Thanks.

4. Let's end the slitting the wrist trope please. Blood grosses me out. And knives scare the shit out of me. That scene in the finale when Meredith walked into the kitchen and saw blood and a bloody knife was eerily reminiscent of how I imagined my roommates felt when they walked into our apartment after my great finger-slicing incident [just you know, without the suicidal stuff].

5. Hire me as a writer because when this thesis thing is over I need a job. [Tonight's preview features an out of control car! Please see two year old post in which I wrote a fictional episode about the trials of me and Jill having SARS which included a runaway car!]

6. My roommates have taken to studying in our living room [gah!] and I feel bad kicking them out - so ABC do you think you could follow MTV's lead and post your shows online like 5 minutes after they are done airing? Seriously, The Hills ends at 10:30 and by 10:38 I am getting my trash TV fix.

7. Volcano. please. I have been asking for this for forever, and now Jill has joined in the fight.

8. If you are unwilling to do a volcano episode [god forbid, Grey's actually thinks something is too ridiculous] please at the very least have some shit go down with the Space Needle. For realz.

9. Did I just type "for realz"?! God. I've lost my mind.

Season Premiere tonight!!!

In anticipation of tonight's 2-HOUR, ACTION-PACKED, EARTH-SHATTERING, THRILL-INDUCING premiere of our own favorite television show, I have been reading various articles and watching old episodes to re-sync my brain with the lives of our favorite fictional characters.

When we last left our heroes, Derek was coming "right back" to Meredith at the candle house after intending to break it off with Rose (but, as every good soap-opera-watcher knows, "be right back" are famous last words that usually result in a kidnapping or bus crash or alien abduction and I am certain that Grey's won't disappoint).

George and Lexie had moved into their contraband-furnished apartment after which George got the Chief to agree to let him re-take the intern exam. A two-hour premiere is more than enough time for George and Lexie to sleep together, and based on their shared kiss in the finale, I bet they won't even last through the first hour of tonight's show.

Alex and Izzie re-entered the awkward phase of their relationship, where the borders between friend and lover are permanently blurred, but atleast Izzie - as a MSNBC entertainment writer wrote - slightly "de-dormatted herself" and stood up to her little interns.

The Chief reunited with his wife, Bailey's marriage is in limbo (but here's hoping they can work it out for their uber-adorable baby Tuck), and Yang, a ghost of her usual caustic and tactless wit, took a page out of Meredith's book and moped about in a sullen haze. But, hey, she did show Lexie how to sew a banana.

Sloane, in a self-interested act barely disguised as an altrustic attempt, provided just enough pretext for Callie and Hahn to test the waters of being "more than friends" - which only further raises the question that there must be no other sex-worthy people except for those inside the walls of Seattle Grace. And don't go feeling sorry for Sloane, as I expect he gets just as much enjoyment out of watching the two women than he would if he were involved with either or both of them himself.

Where will they all go from here? Aside from the obvious options (Meredith being mopey, George and Lexie hooking up, Callie and Hahn moving up the awkward-meter), one can only hope that Grey's transforms itself from the mopiest-show-on-earth (led by its title character in her cycle of "Frown. Sigh. Pout.") into something more upexpected and exciting. To aid the show in its attempts to do this, I provide the following suggestions:

1) Derek gets hit by a bus. I'm not a hater on McDreamy, and I doubt Shonda Rimes would do anything to her studly character that holds her female fan-base, but, seriously, no one can just say the words "I'll be right back" and get away with it.
2) Holding the surgical wing hostage. They've had the plague, they've had workplace shooting victims, but borrow one of my favorite plotlines from Providence and keep the surgeons trapped in Seattle Grace's ORs for a few hours/days/whatever.
3) Stolen Ambulance. This actually occurred in Detroit, and I have been saving it for my CSI:Detroit episode, but if Grey's would like to borrow it, I give them permission. Seattle stolen ambulances are decidedly less grungier and grittier than Detroit's.
4) Something involving the Space Needle. The show is set in Seattle - take advantage of the local attractions! I was really hoping the Space Needle would have fallen on that ferry boat a couple seasons ago, but alas, there was just a bang up crash. Think bigger!
5) Volcanic Eruption. As Alex says, being set in the Pacific Northwest, why has Mt. St. Helens not been incorporated into any storylines as of yet? Boy-encased-in-cement gets blown away by boy-encased-in-lava.

Countdown to premiere: 9 hours, 10 mins

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Stellar news.

Apparently, Shonda Rhimes wants to kill off Izzie since Katherine Hiegl decided to get all uppity over Emmy nominations and say she didn't have the writing to warrant her a nomination this year.
This is probably true, because Gizzie was the most annoying thing ever. Ever.
Thus, I really hope Izzie is killed off. It would be even better than when Meredith was almost killed off.
Actually, a lot of people could be killed off Grey's and I really wouldn't miss them [as K Fig and I have discussed]. George clearly must stay. And Alex for his hottness. Hahn and Callie can stay because the whole lesbian thing is pretty ridiculous. Bailey can also stay because she is awesome. And Sloan can stay just because the whole recent "this man is a whore speech" was also awesome. Cristina I am ambivalent about. Meredith can die. As can Izzie. Ridiculously annoying. We can also trade McDreamy for McVet.
So once again, thank you Perez.

PS. On another note, today I ate some apricot preserves straight from the jar, and I was reminded of that time Izzie ate a whole tub of butter. You know, back when she didn't make me want to kick the TV in.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008


This Thursday the season finale of Grey's is upon us [So soon?! Just when George was getting incredibly adorable again!! Damn you Writer's Strike]. Me, K Fig and Jill will not be able to watch it at the regular time because well, we will be at the Kanye West/Rihanna concert - but hey, thats why they invented videotapes and Sorry Alex Karev, Kanye will be our egotistical maniac for the evening instead.

But the previews for the finale is offering a ridamndiculous teaser of a man trapped in what looks like some sort of stone-ish substance.

Predictions as to what this substance is are as follows:

My mother: A meteor. Props to my mother for thinking of that one. A man trapped inside a meteor is completely ludicrous, which means its a viable guess for a show like Grey's.

K Fig: "It's probably dried cement. Or something lame." This is probably what it actually is, and yes, it will be lame.

Self: Dried lava. For like 2 years now Grey's I have been urging you to make the most of your surroundings - you are in the Pacific Northwest for godssakes, let's have some volcano action!!! [All right fine, I don't know if there is an active volcano legitimately close to Seattle, but hey, nothing on Grey's is legitimate].

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Grey's is now the gayest show on TV.

Well, maybe aside from 'Project Runway.' [<3 btw]

But Hahn finally made out with Callie. In an elevator. In front of Sloan.

In other news, George O'Malley is once again officially the cutest thing. Ever.
George + Tuck = afuckingdorable.

The Chief?
Unexpectedly funny.

Also: why, exactly, did Rebecca/Ava/Jane Doe/Alex's Woman think she pregnant even though she wasn't?
I think Jill's prediction that she actually has the tumor Meredith and Derek are trying to cure is just ridiculously unbelievable enough for Grey's to try pull some shit like that.

Finally a note to the writers:
Izzie was in this episode for only about 3 minutes.
Thank you writers, thank you.
You are starting to wise up to her annoyingness.

Thursday, May 1, 2008


"We screw guys like whores on tequila."
- Meredith Grey

Preach it sister.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Just so we can say we called it.

Two words:


[Why has this not occurred yet on Grey's? Jill, K Fig and I have discussed, and basically Grey's has run out of shit for their little dramatic 3-episode story arcs. Natural disaster is next. Earthquake probably. Volcano if they want to go for awesomeness.]

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Lions and Surgeons and Bears...Oh, my!

I don't know when Grey's Anatomy went off the air. I haven't counted the days or weeks; I don't know how many "potential episodes" could have aired in the time the show was gone. Honestly, I'm not sure I even missed it. Outside motivation to air my frustrations on various blogs, the show doesn't really serve much of a purpose. But still, I faithfully tuned in after the hiatus, to see what the writers had cooked up in ABC's triumphant return of TV.

And, despite all that time off - the best they could come up with is a ripoff of The Wizard of Oz?

Meredith longs to escape "Somewhere Over the Rainbow," but the closest she can get to a song-filled soliloquy is a therapy session. Meanwhile, Rose (the Wicked Witch of the Pacific Northwest) cackles about how much she loves Derek and remains a roadblock to Meredith's fantasy.

Yang, Karev, and Stevens all go running around the hospital like the Munchkins down the Yellow Brick Road because, because, because, because, because they all want to win the Points Competition, which is of course monitored by Bailey-the-Good-Witch-of-the-East, deliverer of sparkly prizes.

Despite all his knowledge about brains, McDreamy remains the Scarecrow - unable to sort out his thoughts about Meredith and Rose and searching for someone to just tell him what to think. Hahn, as the Tin (Wo)man, clearly is heartless in the way she ignores Cristina, even when visiting in her own home. And George, rounding out the trio, wishes to be "King of the Forest" because even though he failed his intern exam, he clearly has enough common sense and courage to do a lot better than all the idiots they have running around performing tests on people.

The bear-attacked-trio swoop in as unexpectedly as the flying monkeys, throwing Seattle Grace into uproar with their see-through wounds and unexpected injuries. (Further evidence that the Grey's writers watched too much Wizard: the rebound-girl-wife was played by the same actress whose character was obsessed with the Oz books in the movie Girl, Interrupted. Coincidence? I think not).

And through it all, the Chief remains the elusive Wizard, who somehow has all the knowledge about brains (neurosurgery), hearts (cardiac surgery), and courage (to not give up even when you lose the sparkly-pager competition), yet still can't manage to get his own life all in order.

When Meredith finally gathers the sense to click her heels together and talk to the therapist (because, really, she had the power all along but she had to realize it for herself), viewers can only hope that she has a Dorothy-esque realization that her life is pretty good - despite the number of times she has tried to throw it away. (Little does she realize there's Lexie, eager to "nest" a la Auntie Em, and provide a stable home for someone. If only the two sisters could get together, maybe they could really help each other out).

So, what will it be next week, oh dear television writers? A little Showboat on a Seattle ferryboat? Or maybe Monty Python - I already heard mention of a "Holy Grail." Oh, I suppose that could also be The Da Vinci Code.

Jaws might be the most appropriate -that way they could work "jumping the shark" into the storyline, instead of just doing it metaphorically each week.


Grey's returns!!

And Meredith is in therapy for not shouldn't this be Justin Chambers?
And there goes Izzy.
Awww, Tucker is kind of adorable.

"What did you do to your hair?"
I love you George. Don't injure your foot.

Oh Alex, I have missed your hawtness.
"And the......anyway?!?!"
Okay Hahn and Callie are totally lesbians together.

I am pretty sure Alex got hotter since the last episode.
[And crazier...]

And a bear?!?!!? lmfao.
"Intestines in the hands!!!!"

Oh, this is going to be amazing.


This fainting man looks vaguely familiar.

This dude with the exposed guts really reminds me of the Taun-Taun Han Solo slices open to keep warm in 'The Empire Strikes Back.'

Also, [side note] are there really apartments as shitty as George's and Lexie's in Seattle?!?
Because that seems a lot more Detroit to me.

Note, just as McSteamy said "Wow that bear clawed you really good" a scroll came along the bottom of the screen advertising the local 11 o'clock news with the headline "Woman mauled by angry dog."

Okay, so Lexie stealing shit is awesome. That is a very Detroit way to decorate your Detroit apartment. Props.

Callie just owned Cristina. Awesome. And PS I forgot they were roommates.

"I got married in the spur of the moment. And I don't have a brain tumor."
"That you know of."
Word to that Meredith.

.....and commercial for McDreamy's new movie. This will not measure up to 'Enchanted.'
Also, McDreamy has been in this episode for like 4 seconds.

Speak of the devil....there he is.

"I love him."
There is a possibility Rose is insane.

"Did you just yell at the Chief?"

"From time to time I like to go to the zoo."
Quality line Chief.

"You touched a cub man. What the hell?"

"Just because you got attacked by a bear doesn't mean you can't talk smack about my wife."

George just said something about seahorses. And it did not make sense.


This dude totally has a brain tumor. You can deny it trashy waitress, but its totally true.

"My instincts have been very bad lately...they told me to have sex with a married man."

Alex emo moment.
Not sleeping becomes you Justin Chambers. You def. got hotter.

And Taun-Taun man dies.
This guy is super creepy. Laughing and crying. Saying he deserves to die. Wtf.

Seattle at night looks pretty.
Maybe I will go visit the Millers and take a side trip up there.


What is with the sparkly electronics on ABC tonight?!

"I thought it was just going to be you and me?"
"Having sex?"
McDreamy and McSteamy just need to have their illicit affair and get it over with.

$120,000 worth of unnecessary tests?!?!?!!
IZZIE you could have paid for my Masters degree like 20 times with that money. Gah.

Callie and Hahn are totally lesbians.
Like, seriously.

I love you George. Have I said that yet today?

Seriously dude, I can afford a better apartment than this. And you're fucking doctors.

Please note college students will soon be volunteering themselves as guinea pigs in Meredith's study so they can afford to live is shitty apartments like George and Lexie's.


[Rebecca/Ava is pregnant!! And Addison is back!!! Yesss.....I have waited for this day!!]

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

the greys blog is so neglected
remember when i dreamed that christina yang shot the goodyear blimp and it deflated and tom brady tripped over it
that is the craziest dream i have ever had
yes i remember that ahahahahha
what does that even mean?
besides the obvious hate of tom brady
i have no fucking clue
i have nothing against the goodyear blimp
yeah that is a random thing to have a grudge against
i am probably the only person to have christina yang and tom brady appear in the same dream
yeah that is a completely nonsensical combo
grey's needs a good random celebrity playing themself to randomly appear in the hospital
like the patriots were playing the seattle seahawks and a bomb went off in the football stadium injuring tom brady
9:41 Away Message: Tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun.
that would be an amazing episode
of course mcdreamy and the chief would just happen to be at the game
this is what the superbowl episode should have been
oh man21
they missed that opportunity
a bomb at a football game is way more exciting then a bomb in a body
of course giselle would have to appear
how would mer almost kill herself in this episode?
tom brady could fall on top of her
that must hurt
mer was at the game too
and then once people realized there was a bomb in the stadium everyone started to panic
and a stampede started
trampeling poor mer
please c/p these IMs onto the blog
I just updated it recently with the crazy Alex

Monday, March 31, 2008

Why are the good ones either gay or crazy?

The strike is over, but alas, we must wait until April 24th for new Grey's episodes! tear.
I was able to live through this drought by watching "Enchanted" on loop [McDreamy is so much more dreamy in that than on Grey's, trust me] and having my Thursday nights taken up with new episodes of 'Lost.'
Now sadly, even 'Lost' has returned to reruns, and I am now feeling the void in my life that is a Thursday night without the lovable trash that is Seattle Grace.

Thank god for Perez Hilton, as he keeps us updated on our favorite interns' exploits.

1. T.R. Knight [love of my life, why are you gay?!?!] has a 19 year-old b/f. They are also now moving in together. Apparently. This shatters any hope I might have that if you met me you might turn straight T.R.

2. Justin Chambers, I thought you were nice guy with five children and a wife or whatever [albeit a nice guy with sleeping issues]. Even though I love Alex [unlike some people], this made me happy as I thought you weren't a complete jerk like your character. Apparently, I was wrong as you are as crazazy as the rest of them.

Please hurry up April 24th, as I am considering filling my need for guilty-pleasure TV by watching 'The Hills.' You can see this is a dire situation.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Code Black

While I anxiously await new episodes of Grey's anatomy, I have decided to recap some of the great episodes of Grey's past. Since I had a wheel of fortune/ code black dream, obviously that will be the first episode.

2 years ago the superbowl was held in the D. In the midst of all the superbowl excitement, ABC started playing a promo for the grey's episode to be shown after the game. This promo featured code black, followed by panic. Unable to wait until the episode aired to find out what code black was, of course I consulted google and found out that it was a bomb. At this point i was super excited for greys. (please note that in this point in the writing of the blog that I read about crayola crayons on wiki)

Basically, the highlight of this episode was A FREAKING BOMB INSIDE OF A BODY!!! Of course mer had to stick her hand inside his chest because she likes to almost die. The end.


Now that the strike is over, episodes of our beloved Grey's will finally return!! excla.

And just to tide you over....

I never thought reading the Bible was sexy until I saw Justin Chambers do it.