Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Grey's Anatomy Episode #4450973406572: The Ears

Nothing ever takes its normal course with me.Who has their ears pierced? EVERYONE.But of course, when I tried to do it - well, things did not go so much as planned.

Yesterday, my ears started to hurt and throughout the course of the day, they got progressively more swollen and red. And then, when getting ready to leave for BW's class, my left ear decided that it had had enough and it swelled up so much that it swallowed up the stud, meaning the ball was actually inside my ear.

Slightly gross, yes. Add to this blood, and needless to say, I was thoroughly disgusted.

You know things are bad when Jill tries to comfort you by saying " least you got a tetnus shot last year when you sliced your finger."


It was then determined that there should be an operation last night to attempt to remove said stuck-in earring. Andew J played the part of the anastegiologist, suggesting I go to Cass Cafe and get drunk before the operation began (which needless to say, we did). The interns included Saraff (who in her drunken state) held an entire lamp up to my ear for better viewing, Stephanie and Karen who in their sobriety tried to reign in the Saraff (Sara: I think maybe Sasha should bite down on a bullet. Stephanie: I don't think she should bite on metal. Maybe this hot mitt would better.), and the roommates who lended their moral support. McJill herself was the surgeon, the best earring removal surgeon UT Grace has to offer.

Sadly, said operation was unsuccessful, as neither earring could be removed easily and blood was coming out of both ears. It was deteremined that I should probably not to go to Harper or Receiving at 1 am, as they would probably only tell me to go get a gun shot wound and come back and then maybe they would look at me. So this morning I had to place the following call to my mother:

Alex: Mom, I am having some health issues.

Mom: (suspicious already) Yeeeessss?

Alex: Over Christmas break I went to go get my ears pierced and -

Mom: What?!Alex: So, you didn't notice then.

Mom: No.

Alex: Oh. Well. Anyway, there are both infected - one is really bad, like the ball of earring is stuck inside my ear and I can't get it out.

Mom: (sigh) Fine. I will call Dr. Kim. I hope you don't need plastic surgery.

But thankfully, my doctor seems to have encountered this problem many times and with dexterity popped out the stuck in earring, and got the other one out as well and then drained both ears. Real doctors do things much better than drunken friends (no offense).

Now I have to wait about 3 months, and if I want to try again, I need to get a higher grade metal than just 14 kt. Boo.

As we got into the car to leave the doctor's office my mom said "This is a shame Alex. Dad gave me some diamond earrings one time, and I still never went and got my ears pierced. I could have given them to you."